Simple Guidance About Sitting with a Medium
Visiting a medium for the first time can be stressful as you have very high hopes and expectations as well as many inner fears about what will happen. Waiting to call us or driving to us to visit can also be stressful. Be aware of this and counteract your stress by consciously remaining as relaxed as you can. In your mind and heart, simply treat it as an experiment and relax. If it works it works, if it doesn’t it doesn’t but everyone will do their best. This attitude will generate relaxed energy and will help the communication and the spiritual energy to flow.
A medium is different to a psychic. A psychic is picking up information about you and your situation but a medium is there to give you information about people who have passed to the other side. A psychic cannot do this as their skill are better focused on life issues, romance, questions about job changes etc. A medium’s job is to prove life after death. Some mediums may occasionally give you information about spirit guides but their primary aim should always be to give you information about people you KNOW in the spirit. (Advice about readings with psychics here)
Will I be told specific facts that I want to hear?
Every sitting must be as an experiment and the success of the sitting cannot be guaranteed. It is not possible for any medium to give specific evidence required by the sitter. The medium will give you some evidence of survival of death which may include things such as how the person died, facts about their life on earth, what they were like as a person and so on. When all of this information is taken together and understood it will hopefully give you proof of the person who is communicating. Once this is established the medium may give some comforting messages from the person in spirit.
It is important also not to feed the medium with information. You can answer yes and no and so on and can be receptive but wait until the end of the reading before filling in all the gaps. If you give too much information at the start it makes it harder for a genuine medium to work as this information will influence their thoughts too much. A good medium who is receptive to spirit will tell you things without you needing to prompt or give clues.
Can they give exact names, places, dates and so on?
Often this can happen but do not go into a reading expecting any medium to reel off surnames, dates and specific facts. In private consultations the energy needs time to build. For example, a medium may give a good character description of the communicating spirit and lots of verifiable information but the name may elude them.
During a reading the medium will know when the spirit communicator draws close and will initially sense them. This is known as clairsentience and will enable the medium to give information about your spirit loved one’s character and personality traits. Clairsentience the medium will enable the medium to describe some of the physical characteristics of the communicating spirit and their illnesses and how they passed.
Mediums who are trained within Spiritualism usually build a description of the spirit initially using clairsentience. They may begin by describing the character and personality traits of the communicating spirit. Once this is confirmed the medium may use clairvoyance to get visual imagery related to the spirit. And if the energy is really high and the conditions are absolutely right they may ‘hear’ through clairaudience names, nicknames, addresses and so on.
Using these methods the medium will be able to give you enough information to hopefully prove to you that the person you love is communicating with you. Be discerning too – it is not good to try and make vague information things fit. Sometimes mediums get things wrong – they are not infallible.
Will my reading be the same as I see on Craig and Jane’s TV shows?
When a medium is working with an audience or with a church congregation he/she has the collective psychic energy of everyone present to work with. This will often enable a good medium to give very accurate information quickly such as names and very specific information. The audience’s energy fuels the mediumship. A theater filled with a thousand or so people can give a huge boost to a medium’s accuracy.
In a private sitting, the medium has only yours and his own energy to work with. Over the phone a medium relies mainly on their own personal spiritual energy. They may give you names, addresses and very specific information but don’t expect them to fire off names from the start. Sometimes the proofs of spirit may not include names etc.
It’s okay also to be skeptical. Our hope is that we will give you compelling information about the spirit communicator that will prove to you without a doubt that the messages from the spirit are real. Keep your ear open for things said that the mediums could not possibly know about you or the spirit communicator. The medium will get some things wrong as mediumship is a subtle thing and the medium’s own thoughts can become entwined in the messages. You need to be alert to the really spot on bits of proof that are very specific to you or the communicator. Also do not let one wrong fact or name fact throw you off. Sometimes the medium can give a wealth of correct information but get’s one simple thing wrong and the novice sitter is in disarray.
An open mind helps and one should have a degree of cheerful and hopeful expectation but not over-expectation. Again treat it as an experiment. The medium will do their best and – if the conditions are right – loved ones will give you proof that your loved ones spirit has survived death.
Can I help with the communication?
Recipients of a reading sometimes think that the medium is a kind of magician who can be left to do all the work and give the proof with no effort on their part. It takes two to make a connection. The medium of course plays the principal role, but the sitter needs to be responsive.
Sitters seldom realize how much depends on them as well as on the medium. An open mind is conducive to a good reading and gets the best results. It is good also to be verbally responsive: The medium needs to hear your voice which acts as a vibration link between you, the medium and your loved ones in spirit. This is particularly important if the reading is taking place over the phone.
The attitude of the sitter should be unprejudiced, friendly, cheerful if possible, receptive and attentive. A sympathetic atmosphere helps the medium tremendously, because a hostile atmosphere hinders him or her. This is why skeptics often do not get as good a reading as an open minded loving person – the emanations of the hostile mind often destroy all possibility of the very evidence which might convince it! Similarly the over eager sitter can spoil things by jumping in to fill in details that the medium was just about to say.
Can they predict the future for me?
A medium’s work is to try to give evidence of survival and not to predict the future. If you would like guidance about the path forward you would be best booking a psychic reader.
Is a private reading the right first step?
For most people talking to a medium after a bereavement is a huge step and you may not initially feel comfortable about calling a medium to talk on the phone. If this is the case with you then you may want to visit your local Spiritualist Church where you can get a reading for free. We also have a community area on this website that’s free where you can chat to Spiritualists and occasionally watch and take part in online evenings of clairvoyance.
Take your time
Have a reading when you feel ready. Whether you have the courage to call a medium by phone or first want to seek solace through Spiritualism there is no hurry. Do not expect the sort of readings you see on television because often the pauses are edited out so it seems that the readings are much more punchy than you are likely to experience in life. In fact if you watch any mediums at work – including Jane and me – you’ll see that mediumship is much more gentle than what you’ll see at a public demonstration.
Can a medium tell me about health issues or predict a pregnancy?
No. I will not make a medical diagnosis including predicting a pregnancy. They may tell you about how to cope or deal with an issue but I will not offer herbal or other advice. Please seek the proper qualified doctors or medical practitioners.
Will I get the proof I need?
Final proof of life after death can take many years of seeking. Sometimes a medium will give you what you are looking for immediately and at other times it may take years before you get the absolute proof that you seek. Medium readings are just part of a great spiritual journey that will eventually give you comfort and, most importantly, the overwhelming and irrefutable proof that life indeed does continue after death.